Dating a serial cheater
Cheating in general is so common that it further complicates separating out what is serial cheating and what is just the normal state of affairs (as it were).
The statistics I have seen are from the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy: • Percentage of men who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they’ve had: 57% • Percentage of women who admit to committing infidelity in any relationship they’ve had: 54% • Percentage of men and women who admit to having an affair with a co-worker: 36% • Average length of an affair: 2 years As if that weren’t enough, they also cite the following: • Percentage of men who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 74% • Percentage of women who say they would have an affair if they knew they would never get caught: 68% So what constitutes “serial cheating” in the addictive sense?
You keep your phone history clear or blacklist numbers from being able to call you or text you. Sure, it’s much easier to go and have sex with your secretary than it is to leave town and go somewhere and meet someone randomly, but New York City’s big enough where you can meet someone who you will never see again. One time, we just wanted to make it happen, and it was like, “We can’t make out in the street.
But then I met her, and there was nothing I could do. It was with one of the first people I dated, but when she was breaking up with me, she told me, “I was cheating on you a lot, so this isn’t going to work.” I wasn’t annoyed. I felt like I had missed out, that I could have hooked up with people, too, and I turned down all these opportunities with great girls. You know what you’re getting into when you start to kiss that person and touch her neck, her back, her shoulder, her waist. The first thing out of my mouth isn’t “I have a girlfriend,” but if I got asked the question, I wouldn’t lie.
I started to fall in love with her, and I wanted to be exclusive. For some reason, I feel wrong about lying, but I’m fine with leaving out the truth. That’s one of the things that I always think about.
I made excuses that revolved around my partner’s perceived shortcomings.
If I felt they weren’t paying me enough attention, I would find someone who would be nice to me for a few hours, a couple of days a week.